millenniumfalconteahouse:

timelady-of-221b:

joeeatspeople:

yesidolikecoatsbigtime:

Types of people who romanticize small town life:

  1. People who didn’t grow up in small towns

#THE LOCALS AREN’T QUIRKY#THEY’RE RACIST

#THERE’S NOTHING TO DO
#EVERYONE’S ON DRUGS

#WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE GANGSTERS YOU ARE WHITE AND THERE ARE COWS OUTSIDE

troyesivan:

#truth

troyesivan:

#truth

turntable-thoughts:

glittergooch:

I hate when black clothes are a slightly different black and don’t match

we joke but this is an actual thing

I’m sorry, Piper. I’m sorry for all of it.

alexstark-the-hunter:

FREEDOM OF SPEECH MEANS THE GOVERNMENT CANT THROW YOU IN JAIL FOR VOICING YOUR OPINION IT DOES NOT MEAN YOUR PEERS CANNOT VIEW IT NEGATIVELY OR REPRIMAND YOU ON BEING A DICK IT DOES NOT MEAN YOUR PLACE OF EMPLOYMENT IS OBLIGED TO PUT UP WITH YOU GIVING THEM A BAD NAME IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU GET TO BE OPPRESSIVE IN YOUR WORDS AND ACTIONS THEN CRY WHEN YOU ARE CALLED OUT ON IT NOW SHUT UP FUCK PLEASE AND THANK

shikarius:

Dad’s gotten 1000% better talking about periods since we started using Shark Week euphemisms:

"Ah, it’s Shark Week?" = "Ah, you started your period?"

"Harpoons on deck?" = "Do you have enough pads/tampons/etc?"

"Chum stocks are holding?" = "Do you need chocolate/midol?"

"Supplies are low cap’n" = "Yes, please."

"What kind (of shark) is it?" = "How do you feel?"

  • "It’s a Nurse Shark" = "I’m fine/not bad"
  • "GREAT WHITE OFF THE STARBOARD BOW" = "FUCKING OW"
accordingtodevin:

The science behind tangled earphones.

accordingtodevin:

The science behind tangled earphones.

elegancea:

Sometimes, the best way to not get your heart broken is to act like you don’t have one.